Skip to main content

Christmas Eve

As I recap this year's Christmas season it is difficult to process it all.  We went about our normal traditions and activities with the knowledge that Grandma Mary was finishing her journey here on earth.  It was the morning of December 21st that I got a text from my dad saying that Grandma was unresponsive.  My sister, Kelly, and I hurried up to the VA nursing home to say our last goodbyes.  We knew this day would come and we have been hoping it would sooner rather than later.  Grandma has not been herself.  She needed to move on.  Still, the thought of her not being around was a heavy sadness mixed with disbelief and happiness for her to be free from her frail body and mind.  It was my 22nd wedding anniversary and Russell and I had plans.  I wanted to be with Grandma as she passed but I also wanted to celebrate with the love of my life.  It was not a hard decision for me to make.  I would spend time with Russell but Grandma was on my mind.

She made it through the night and we were able to take the kids on Saturday to say goodbye to her.  She was on straight morphine to keep her comfortable and she looked like she was already dead lying still and pale in her bed.  It was not a sight anyone wanted to see but there was a feeling of peace there in the room.  She lived through another night.

I was not sleeping well thinking of Grandma and wondering when she would go.  My mom stayed with her each night and almost every daytime minute.  I expected a call at any moment but for some reason she would not go.  It was exhausting to play the waiting game.

We decided to keep our Christmas Eve tradition of bowling only Grandma Lee would not be there.  We missed her but understood she needed to be with Grandma Mary.
Aurora and Payson

Cute cousins





We were in the middle of our celebration when we got the news that Grandma had passed.  We all stopped for a moment and shed a tear of sadness and relief.  We knew we would have our mom for Christmas now and that Grandma was finally free.  It was bitter sweet.  We still had fun.  I will never forget Christmas Eve 2012 but it will not be a ruined day that I will always remember.  It will be a beautiful, wonderful, amazing Grandma that I love so very much.





Photobucket
Labels:

Comments

Sherrie said…
So sorry for your loss. I am glad you have peace in knowing she is in a better place. I am glad you had an enjoyable Christmas even through your grief and loss of your dear Grandma.
January 5, 2013 at 7:17 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

On Top of the World

I have never been a runner. I have grown up around runners. My dad has run 7 or 8 marathons. My mom has run 2. My husband ran one 7 years ago. I have always cheered from the sidelines and wondered why in the world anyone would EVER do something like that. It is just plain ridiculous. In my quest to get rid of the after math of 2 pregnancies in a years time I decided to step my workouts up a bit. I am a really good walker. I would much rather walk 4 miles than run 1 but I needed to burn more calories. So, running it was. I decided if I mostly walked with some intermittent running that would help. I started out running the downhill portions of my 2 mile loop. Pretty soon I would walk my 2 miles, put Mason down for a nap and run a few loops in the park. About a month ago, Russell challenged me to run the full 2 miles. He pushed the baby stroller while we ran. I was not very conversational , but I did it! I was so proud of myself. I incorporated that 2 mile run into my wor...
11 comments
Read more

Family Pictures

These are the photos that lovingly adorn my entry way welcoming the world to our home. Stockton was 3, Douglas was 7 and Russell and I were somewhat younger than we are now. For pretty obvious reasons it was time to get a new picture on the wall.  I REALLY hate the whole process of family stress  pictures.  Everyone needs recent haircuts, clothes need to be clean and somewhat matching.  A location needs to be chosen, a poor sucker has to accompany us to snap the shots, no runny noses or cold sores can be present, Mason must be happy, Stockton must be agreeable and Douglas and Russell must be supportive.  So, over the weekend I forced my family to humor me and get this HUGE feat over with.  I am pretty happy with the results. Of course, for every good shot there are about 10 not so good ones!  You try and make a toddler hold still and smile nice!  My nephew, Jordan, asked his mom why I got to be in charge.  I told him i...
13 comments
Read more

Arizona

Our love of baseball has taken us on some of our coolest family vacations.  Last week, Douglas' team played in the Triple Crown Spring Training tournament.  We decided to cash in our sky miles so all of us could go cheer him on.  A toddler on my lap for a 2 hour flight was a little more enticing than enduring a 12 hour roadtrip, each way.  Douglas wasn't too sad that he missed the team travel in a 16 passenger van.  Can you imagine it?  8 teenage boys...together...lauging....texting...stinking.  No thanks!  His coaches are saints! As seems to always be the case, travel day was hectic.  Watching our family go through airport security must be somewhat entertaining.  There are the Ipods, the belts, the shoes, the stroller, the laptop, the portable DVD player, the camera, the sippy cup, the blanket....followed by the howls of a little boy who got his fingers pinched when the stroller collapsed on him as we tried to contain him to...
10 comments
Read more